Peace Be Still/Steel

Only those in the "charismania" streams will appreciate this video. While it is a bit over the top, the jumps in biblical logic are not unlike those we saw in so many of our services. Click here. to enjoy/endure. Ht: Paul Grabill

Warning: Those with Post Charismatic Stress Syndrome (PCSS**) may want to wait a few more months before watching this video. :) May cause depression in those who have previously participated. May cause extreme agitation in those who did not stand up to say something. May also cause uncontrollable laughter in those who can now see it all as ridiculous. Be forewarned, if you are presently in a 'church' that practices this you may have a strange impulse to defend it.

**No, you may not copy this!

Well, ok, I guess you can, but you have to give me credit. (Unless I stole it from you)

I Love Jesus But I Drink A Little

You can put this phrase on my tombstone! I laughed till I cried. Must be the combination of taking care of my 87 year old parents and working on taxes today.

Shrek - A Mother's Day Story

In light of it being Mother’s day today, here is my very favorite and most funny story from my kids’ lives.

My youngest came along in 2000. (Such a convenient year for trying to remember the birth years of 7 children.) He was and is still to this day the delight of our family.

Being the youngest, we had the baby thing down. See, in the north when your baby is a year and a half old and it is winter, you have to do something to get out of the house. Our favorite past time with #7 was to take him to the mall and walk him around in the stroller. Since he had two older sisters who had their driving license we would ship him off to the mall with whatever adult was free to quiet his typical toddler angst.

He was of course learning how to talk but he had a particular speech impediment that I have heard from other children but none of mine had had to that point. He would substitute FU for TR or SHR. For instance this made a Fire Truck sound like Fire F**k. Quite comical to his older siblings.

This particular year turned out to be the year that Shrek had just come out on DVD. All his siblings were enamored with this film and our discontented toddler could be counted on to be content while it was playing. We played it A LOT! I can quote large passages of Shrek better than most Bible passages. (Any parents out there give a witness?) (I also have large passages of Veggie Tales, The Little Mermaid, The Emperors’ New Groove, Aladdin and Toy Story memorized – just to name a few. Oh, if only Masters Degrees in Disney Movies could be bequeathed.) So as his vocabulary expanded from Ma Ma and Da Da, his favorite character was one of his first words.

Now you need to know that his speech impediment, added to his devotion to Shrek, caused there to be a bit of a stir in my house because, of course, when he wanted to watch his favorite movie he would begin screaming, “I want F**k, I wanna watch F**k. We would giggle and like good parents of the 7th child, we would watch F**k again with him for the 4th time that day. (Do not even try to judge me...I was home shcooling! :0)

Now, back to the mall. The movie store decided to promote the next Shrek movie with a full sized cardboard cut out of Shrek and his sidekick “Donkey.” Our child, upon delightedly seeing life sized cutouts of his most favorite characters, stood straight up in his stroller yelling and pointing at the top of his lungs, “F**k – n – Donkey!!!! F**k – n – Donkey!!!! (You need to say this aloud, slurred together to get the full effect.)

The mall went silent. It seemed as if even the insipid mall music ground to a halt in horror. Everything went into slow motion as all heads turned in our direction. And like good parents of a 7th child we were …….embarrassed……dismayed…..shocked…..well, nooooo ……. if you want to know, we were on the floor laughing, unable to form a coherent thought to try and quiet our potty mouthed one year old.

No flowers on Mother’s day will give me more delight than being able to tell this story again.