Another Resource - The Heresy of Mind Control (and a dare!)

Sometimes it is just easier to hear the truth from a totally unbiased source. It can be very hard to listen to people's stories and not wonder if their memory is truly good, if they are exaggerating the truth in any way or if they might be outright lying. I understand this.

One of the most helpful things for me in this whole process was to read from those who were not talking about my particular group or even denomination. It was in looking at what they were saying and seeing the stark reality of how closely our group paralleled an abusive environment that I was able to understand that what we were doing was harmful.

I found another resource this week that again will cause you to re-evaluate all that we did and participated in while at this Church.

Stephen Martin, a counselor from Wellspring in Ohio (a group that helps people coming out of controlling groups and/or cults) has written a clear, concise book about how mind control works in a group.

He says in the introduction, "Suppose you move to a different area, and are keeping your eyes open for a good group to belong to (a social club, a church, a synagogue, or service organization). You visit one such group where the people are very friendly, loving, and give you individual attention. The group has a variety of programs: a rehabilitation program for drug addicts, services and nursing homes for the elderly, help for the poor, and free clinics. The leader inspires the disillusioned, the disenchanted, and those who have been rejected elsewhere. He is well-known and respected in the area, and the mayor gave him a position as Director of the City Housing Authority. Would you join this group?" - You just joined Jim Jone's group! He goes on to explain his book this way, "Are there any warning signs that a group and its leader are dangerous? That’s largely what this book is about. "

Now I'm NOT saying that this Church will start passing out the Kool-aid next Sunday. I am saying that if you will read this it will become clear to you why the abuse keeps happening and why story after story continues to churn out of this group of people's lives being destroyed and their faith shaken.

It is NOT WRONG to read and consider an opposing viewpoint. If you went to a dealership and wanted to buy a particular model of car and the salesman, after explaining all the wonderful features of the car urged you to NOT go and read Consumer Report's review on this car nor hear anyone's concerns on the web about this car, you would be the FIRST to go and look that up. Information, even from those who are in disagreement, is not "Poison" to read. If you cannot look at the opposing viewpoint and refute it within your own heart and mind then you truly are not "free" as you claim.

The free download of this book can be found here: http://recognizeheresy.com/default.aspx

For those leaders at this Church that read here I simply dare you to read this and have a discussion with me.

Spiritual Tyranny Dot Com

Here is a link I encourage you all to explore. In some way this author may have gotten pushed aside as simply a discontent from the Sovereign Grace Ministry churches. The site is MUCH more than that though. He speaks/explains fluently the language of tyranny in all forms - church, social, political. He does this by challenging the very basis of our preconceptions. I have been simply blown away by his ability to make me feel as if I am a rational, volitional thinking person capable of knowing Good and acting on it. (I'm growing a spine as I sit here and read :)

Here is one for those in controlling churches that I think you will be able to digest and go "OMG!! What was I thinking?" "Spiritual Crack" by John Immel

But don't just read this one article. Go back into his previous articles and simply read from the beginning. It will challenge everything you have ever believed but it will make you look into your heart and find that he speaks what we always knew was true and gives us a platform to actually build something.

Interested in church government? Leadership? Politics? or just simply are you in despair because of what you have walked through? Strap on a water bottle and grab your best hiking boots because this is not for the faint of intellect or spirit. (as an aside, there have been times where I wondered if I had the background to understand some of the things he is trying to explain. Hang in there. What you don't understand becomes clearer the more you read and exercise that part of the brain that may have laid dormant for a while. For you brainier bunch...you will have no trouble and actually enjoy the exercise.)

Pursuit of The Sinless Life

I have been a Christian for at least 48 years of my life. Just this week though I realized something about myself that I had packed along on this new journey of Grace. Something that I had assumed all along and had just come along with me into what I thought was a new mindset. In actuality, I had just carried over the old mindset and applied it to the new.

The thing I realized was that at least from the time I entered Bible School at 19 till today I have looked at salvation as a means so that I might not sin. Of course I always knew I would never be sinless. But at least my idea of this Christian life was that as I "grew in the Lord" I would sin less and less.

I just got rid of a lot of books from my book shelf the other day. As I stood back and surveyed them I realized how very many books I had hoped would free my from my sinful self. There were books on how to make my marriage better, books on deliverance, books on taming the tongue, books on becoming more godly, books to help me understand the Bible more - because we all know if we know our Bible, we will not sin as much. (My God, just do an amazon search on Joyce Meyers. People have made their fortunes on sin management books.)

Then as I was listening to a podcast that Darin Hufford did the other day, (Super Spiritual Expectations) he blew me away with one statement. He said, "There are a lot of people who are wondering if they embrace this Grace message, that maybe, then, they will experience the freedom from sin that never came in their old religious life." He went on to say that the message of Grace is about a relationship - not about becoming sinless.

I realized that I had thought to myself, "Maybe if I understand Grace, understand the Father's heart for me and understand how to actually have a relationship with Him, maybe I will get a handle finally on my _____________." (fill in the sin of the moment) I was simply replacing the books on my shelf with the message of Grace in hopes that it would do for me what they left untouched.

But that is not what Grace is for. Grace was given, "in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Grace was given in spite of our sin. Grace was given because we could not do it. It was not given so that we then would be victorious, it was given because we will never be victorious. He loves me IN MY SIN.

There is a fine line somewhere here that I don't want to cross. I'm really not sure where it is though. I feel like Paul who says, "so will we sin more just because of Grace - Heavens NO." I'm not advocating giving up and just diving into my sin, knowing that Grace has covered it. But it is a mind shift of monumental proportions for me.

The message of Grace is not for me to obtain so that I can finally get my act together. It is offered to me because I can't. It truly "is finished," and there is nothing I can add to this. And so today I find myself overwhelmed by the act of Love that brought this into my life.

(*by the way, I have never read the book shown above. Just thought it was a great picture for what I was talking about. It might be a wonderful book :)

So Then, How Are We Changed? - Grace Given

I have been back in the office more since the kids went back to school. Because of this I have been catching up on some podcasts.

I've listened to many of Darin Hufford's podcasts the past few days. I listen to him because Darin still has the ability to make me cringe and push me past my comfort zone. He and the gang that broadcasts with him, pokes and prods at my religiosity, constantly uncovering new ground that I have not thought of before. His book, "The Misunderstood God: The Lies Religion Tells About God," is ready to be released next month and I would encourage you to get a copy and read it.

The other day though he said something that I've chewed on ever since. (I'm not quoting him but just telling you what I heard.)

He said something to the effect that, "love received" is not what really changes us but - "love given" - does.

He went on to say that if we look around at people in our lives, we all can see that love given to a parent, friend, child, spouse or stranger is never a guarantee that that person will change. We all know of the wayward teen who has parents at home that love that child so much, or the wife who chooses to walk out the door with a husband behind that longs to have her back, or of the countless people in shelters who have someone reaching out to them with love and a hot meal. Yes, sometimes we see those people respond and change, but what Darin said is that it is interesting to him that when he sees someone love, when he sees a person decide to DO the loving, you always see change happen.

We are changed by giving love.

In my own life I can look back and just observe the times that I have changed the most radically. I see it as I review times such as marrying my husband and learning to give for probably the first time, having my first child and realizing that 'I' no longer existed and suddenly I had to decide on a life of service, or reading "Blue Like Jazz," a few years ago and understanding that I really did not love people like I should and then start to act on it, or the times I faced loving and standing with my grown children as they made decisions that broke my heart, or the times I faced choosing to give love and grace to those who may have hurt me

All of these times mark clearly, the times that I have seen a change in me. Times when the core of who I was was somehow softened and molded into what Jesus may have intended for me in the first place. They purged the selfish "me" and brought out a more grace-filled "me."

I suspect, in my musings about Grace lately, that Grace is just like this. I have understood, it with a head knowledge of God's Grace towards me. But was always frustrated that I did not see an equal amount of change in my life. Therefore, I wonder if I am really changed more by Grace given to me and then in return poured out on those around me than I am with just Grace received and not given away. It sure seems that way.

I suspect that Grace truly becomes alive in us and may actually change our hearts as it is being given out to someone else and not by just having the head knowledge that we have received it. How many times have we given Grace and withheld judgment towards someone and find that something deep inside our hearts has been purged? How many times do we, with gritted teeth, choose to forgive and give Grace and then find that something in our heart has been softened by the very act?

And isn't that just like the Gospel to have us dispense what has been given to us? Hmmm, maybe there is something to that verse that it is better to give than receive!

Just something I'm thinking about this morning. What about you. Have you seen a change in yourselves as Grace was given to you or as you gave it? Stories, please, if you have them!

Read This!

With my inability to form a coherent written thought these days and with my blog going more than a month with nothing on it, I would like to direct you to the post that Jeff McQ wrote today over at his blog, Losing My Religion. The post is God is in the Darkness (Part 1 - Afraid of the Dark)

He writes on how his life used to be filled with battling the demonic realm and why it has faded much farther into the background of his spiritual life in recent years.

I have had this conversation with many people lately who ask me why I don't keep my guard up against the enemy (devil) like I used to, how I can have my older children bring ______ into our home, (whatever the person is deciding is bad for us at that moment) or why we would let them be here and not be actively worshiping the same God. Jeff just says, almost to the word, exactly what I have tried to explain to them.

A Disciplined Life

I read this today in "The Inner Voice of Love" by Henri J. M. Nouwen. He says,

"To live a disciplined life is to live in such a way that you want only to be where God is with you."

I recoil when I hear the words "disciplined life." But in reading the rest of the sentence I thought to myself, "How utterly beautiful."

Discipline was always followed by the word "should" and never the word "want."
Discipline was always devoid of relationship.
Discipline was always about ME.
Discipline was like riding a roller coaster....there were up's and down's but eventually I always ended back where I started.
Discipline always lead to placing myself on a win - loss line.
Discipline always welcomed the inevitable comparisons to others.
Discipline or the lack of it always gave fodder for how I felt about myself that day.

So today as I reflect on the idea that it could be simply wanting to be where God is today in my life I realize that the concept of discipline can be totally revamped into something of simple beauty.

This discipline - as described in the above sentence is about want - not should
It is all about relationship.
It is all about Him.
It may actually take me somewhere - at least where He is going.
It destroys the win-loss line.
It compares itself to no one - not even myself.
It allows me to bask in how He feels about me today instead of how I feel about myself or how others may feel about me.

Loved....at rest.

Post-Charismatic Evangelism

UPDATE: Here are those writing and linking to the questions raised in this blog:
Sarah @ Coffee Randoms: Thoughts on Evangelism
Jeff McQ @ Losing my Religion: Re-thinking Evangelism (and lots of other stuff) and Over-marketing the Watered-Down Version and How I Got Saved...
Ruth from Grains of Truth: Knocking on Heaven's Door
Co_Heir @ On the Journey: Evangelism
Also see Internet Monk's post on John Macarthur on TBN - watch the video and let me know what you think.
Andrew @ Hackman's Musings writes this: Evangelism



I think one of the hardest subjects for me to approach since having so much of what I formerly believed stripped away, is the subject of Evangelism.

I was raised a hard-core Fundamentalist. In every sermon (Sunday morning, Sunday night and Wednesday night) you would have the "plan of salvation" shared in case someone unknowingly wandered from off the street, came into your church and died that night and went to hell because someone did not share the "plan of salvation" with them. I even vaguely remember someone being fired over the fact that they did not share the "plan of salvation" often enough in their sermons. This salvation message was one of the fact of Hell, the plan for avoiding Hell, and the subsequent "sinners prayer" that would keep you out of Hell. Anything else in Christianity was just not really talked about.

Enter my years early in marriage - saved from Fundamentalism - and we understood salvation to be a way to a better, joyful, peaceful life. We would ask people if they wanted what we had. It was a bit of salvation from hell mixed in with a wonderful, meaningful life for the here and now.

Then finally in my Charismatic years I finally thought I had hit upon the greatest plan of salvation EVER!! Here in Charismatic land you could have all the "perks, bells and whistles." You could have your sins forgiven, be healed, prosper, do signs and wonders, be a leader and live a joyful, exciting purpose-filled life - all while signed up to be a part of the end time army that would ACTUALLY usher in the return of Jesus!!! We pitched the Christian life like those salesmen on late night TV. Your life would be amazing if you signed on the bottom line to become Jesus' disciple.

Darin Hufford puts it so well in his post, Gratefully Disillusioned, where he says

"I believe that Christianity has been marketed to the carnal nature of unbelievers. We successfully got people who would not have otherwise become a Christian to sign on the dotted line and join our religion. We did it by presenting "relationship with God" in a way that would appeal to power-hungry money mongers who want to escape the cold reality of life. We told people that God would financially prosper them. We told them that they would never get sick and if they did, God would make it go away. We've promised them that if anyone hurt them, their God would stick up for them and get revenge on their behalf. We convinced them that God would also give them godlike powers and they could dazzle their friends and family with magic tricks. We promised them that God would make sure they held a position of leadership in life where everyone would respect them and pay them honor. I've even seen different ministries claim that Christians have better sex than non-Christians. The list goes on and on. One by one, people signed up for Christianity. People who would not have otherwise given it a second look, found themselves strangely tempted with a religion that promised to fulfill their every carnal desire. The offer was just too good to be true."

(Read this excellent article as he goes on to say that we may not even have true Christians if this is what they signed up for.)

So here is my dilemma. If I am against using the "Hell card"as my "hook" in sharing my faith and I refuse to bend to the "hook" of the Jesus of the late night infomercials full of promises that never live up to their expectations, what am I left with? What exactly is my faith? How do I explain it to people? What is Evangelism? What did Jesus do with the disciples? What was this Kingdom of God that they shared about? What is the gospel - the "good news" to you and how would you share it with an unbeliever?

Another set of questions that interest me are these: Why did you become a Christian? What is your story? Did you sign up for the perks and if so, how is that going for you? Were you truly "drawn to God" in some way where the "perks" that I am talking about really did not matter?

If you have any thoughts about Evangelism (past or present)- please leave them in the comment section - or better yet - post your thoughts and link to it here. I'll update this post with links at the top if anyone wants to be added to the conversation.

A New Year: Of Brokenness and Healing - Alex Blanton

A man named Alex Blanton left a comment on my post the other day about a Hope Deferred: Heart Flat Lined. He gave me a link to something he had written at the beginning of this new year. I wanted to highlight his post today in its entirety as it answers my post with wisdom and insight of what is going on in so many of our lives. Enjoy!

A New Year: Of Brokenness and Healing

Here we are again at the brink of a new year. In the past, I have usually taken the opportunity of breaking away for a little planning, a little casting of vision, and a bit of praying about all the shining new opportunities that the Lord would have in store for the coming year. This is all just fine and swell.

This past year however, I feel like Father has been slowly and methodically taking every plan, dream, vision, etc. and put them through the shredder. (It's funny - I actually remember praying and singing that they were His.) Now I stand looking into this new year, and you know what? I am pretty desperate for something completely new.

No - not just a new vision, plan, dream, whatever - I desperately need Him to pop me open and pour bucket after bucket full of Himself into my utter emptiness. It has not been fun to watch Him unravel and deconstruct all my false notions and paradigms I have had about following and living for Him, and I am not sure He is done yet, but I realize that if I do not have He Himself fill me to overflowing with all of who He is, then I am utterly without hope.

But is this not true of all of us? Why must He use our suffering to expose our illusions, fallacies, and delusions - to reveal our true emptiness and brokenness? But why do we run from it?

Funny thing is that I have watched many that the Lord has had us in contact with in these last few years, and it seems like they are all going through similar transitions. The Father has taken them through disruptions and other unpleasantness to find their former expectations unfulfilled and oddly hollow. It's not like God takes pleasure in thwarting our pursuits and expectations, but strangely, it is as if He is not content in letting us chase after these things any longer, no matter how worthy or meaningful they appeared to us before.

Does anything compare to receiving and experiencing the depths of God Himself? Could it be that "we have all like sheep gone astray, each of us to chase after our own vain fantasies?"

We have been told for so long, with the best of intentions I think (and not without scriptural precedent), that we should all be seeking and listening for God's will for our lives - looking for "God's purpose for our lives." He is the King. Yes! Pursuing our own purposes and expectations for our lives has never worked out, we think to ourselves, so knowing and following His plan would be so much better!

So, we wait for some divine message. We parse the heavens and the earth. We look at our lives and our circumstances for signs that help us unravel this code for why God has us where we are, going through what we are going through. Surely, we think, this is all happening for some greater purpose, that we are supposed to be a part of something greater than ourselves. If somehow, we think, we can figure out what that thing is, then all the pieces of our lives will fall into place. (Or at least the ones that make it bearable.)

Okay - so, now something happens and we are convinced this may be an overture of divine grace upon our lives - God's immanent hand moving to reveal to us at last His intentions for our mundane existence. So, we jump into it, full of gusto, and get on with the business of fulfilling God's purposes and expectations for our lives. No pressure there! But we jump in nonetheless. This is God's plan, right? What could possibly go wrong.

Then things go wrong.

Either through someone else, something else, or even (most of the time) through just ourselves, things manage to get screwed up. Royally. Not a little hurt and confused, we crawl back to Jesus for grace, licking our wounds. OK - this was our fault probably. So, we get back out there and go to work at The Plan again. Fulfilling God's purposes and expectations should be doable - we've got the Holy Spirit working with us and all that, right?

Well, somewhere along the way things get mixed up, screwed up, misdirected, misguided, misunderstood, again and again and again. Not enough time, not enough energy, not enough passion, discernment, motivation, money, commitment - the list of our failures and shortcomings goes on and on. The problem with living at trying to fulfill God's purposes and expectations for our lives is that when we cannot live up to them, we have to answer to God Himself. Each time things go wrong, we come back more disappointed and disillusioned. What is going on God? Was this not Your plan here that you wanted me to fulfill? It is Your purposes for my life I am trying to work out here! It is Your Kingdom that I am trying to extend! Some get frustrated and angry believing that God is distant and uninterested at best, fickle and unjust at worst. Some beat themselves up with guilt for their inadequacies, believing that God is not pleased with them, always standing just out of reach. Either way, we are rather let down that we are still left standing with a bunch of broken puzzle pieces. Everyone seems to have an opinion or a suggestion about how they are supposed to go together, but somehow we just don't really care anymore.

Does this sound familiar?

from beginning to end. What have we really been pursuing in our hopes of fulfilling God's mission and purpose for our lives? Did it ever occur to us that God may, in fact, be the one frustrating our efforts? Like, on Do you see something wrong with this picture though? This story has really been all about my purpose?

The problem with this whole scenario of discovering God's greater purposes for the universe, is that corrupt tendency in us to then chase after that thing rather then after God Himself. Why do we keep doing this? Why do things always get twisted into being about how we can fulfill our supposed needs and desires if we somehow get things right? We scour the scriptures. We take furious notes. We serve diligently. We give faithfully. We pray passionately. But we are still doing it for ourselves.

Here is the paradigm shift for me, folks: From life being about me finding and fulfilling God's purposes for my life, to life being about God finding me and God fulfilling my life in Him.

I believe this is where we get things all turned around and mixed up, and He is allowing us to get just as frustrated and disillusioned as we need to in order to figure it out. He knows that our deepest needs - the need for security and significance in life - can only be fulfilled in Him. But in our brokenness, we seek to use even God and His "purposes" as a means to find and fulfill this within ourselves. It's still all about us. Even in pursuing all those things that are good and wonderful about God and His' plan for the universe, we will still miss the mark if our goal is not deeper knowledge of Him.

Knowing God is not a cognitive exercise, a means by which we will have the tools to succeed in living life for Him. If that is our paradigm, then He will let us trip and fall as many times as it takes for us to see that we are missing it. This is a supreme act of intimacy, of laying ourselves bare before one in whom we can trust, and discovering the other has done the same. What God desires of us, is that we would choose to be vulnerable and bare - open and honest before Him. Open and honest with our shame and blemishes, to bare even the darkest corners of our hearts. To stand naked before Him and be revealed in even in our most bitter suffering.

Why? Because this is our true selves. The one that we try to cover and hide. The one that we try to marginalize through our own efforts. The one that we think that we can heal and patch up through fulfilling even the fantasies that we have about serving and following God. But God is not interested in our fantasies - the illusions we hold about ourselves, or of what we will do for Him.

You see, our brokenness warps even our love and our desire for Him. What He is interested in is us seeing ourselves as we truly are, in all of our brokenness, and choosing to not hide from Him any longer, but to stand naked before Him. In that moment, we discover that He has seen our true selves all along, but it is we who were fooled. It is this self-deception that keeps us from being healed and experiencing the depths of His surpassing love.

Until we are honest with who we really are, however, we are not open to receive the Love that transforms and heals our brokenness. In that moment, we discover that He has already returned the trust and vulnerability of love, and always has. Why would He risk so much on Adam and Eve? Why would He lay down His' own life, become a man to suffer for the sake of humanity? Could God really be so open and bare before us? Nakedness faces nakedness, and all is revealed. This is knowing and being known by God.

Each of us has an inherent need for security and significance, but we think these things are found to actually doing something. What we fail to realize is this: It is love that makes us safe and secure. It is love that makes us significant and important. Think about it: When we are truly loved by someone we experience all the security and significance that we need to simply be who we are. No more, no less. But if we feel we must put on pretenses, fulfill expectations, or otherwise be more than who we really are then the relationship is lacking real depth, isn't it? If we do not feel truly safe and significant to God, then His love has not been perfected in us. Perfect love casts out all fear. When we experience and live daily in the confidence of this love however, it transforms how we view ourselves, and how we respond to others, to life, to His' promptings on our hearts.

It also opens us up to receive the healing that comes by knowing Him in our deepest and most vulnerable places. 1 John says "If we confess our sin, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sin and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." This honest bearing of our brokenness and inability to carry out His purposes is exactly this kind of confession. When we finally see who we really are, and we stop running to other vain ambitions (even those we pursue in His name), then He is able to show the deepest work of His' love and healing in our lives. He begins to make us whole.

Why does He do this? So we can get back out there and finally "get it right?" Finally fulfill His purpose, His mission, His grand plan for the cosmos? What you think this "grand plan" really is will affect the answer I think. I think the reason we fall short as disciples and as the Body of Christ is not that we fail to grasp the mission and purposes of God, but that we fail to grasp worship in it's true and proper context. God's plan was to have a people that would enjoy the same relationship with Him that He enjoys within Himself.

Why do we think the love of God is a prelude to something else, something greater? We have heard it said that sin is it's own punishment. This may be true, but the flip side of this is that love is it's own reward. God Himself will be our reward for knowing and following Him. There is nothing beyond this. God's purpose is Himself. His' plan for the cosmos and for all humanity is Himself. He is the I AM. The one who is self-fulfilled and fulfilling of all things in Himself. That we would know and be known by Him, in the same manner of which I have been writing, is the sole purpose of knowing and doing anything at all.

This is exactly what we see revealed in the closing sections of scripture - at the end of time we finally see what God has intended all along for us humans. That we, both together and individually, would know and be known by Him. As a bride with her husband, so shall we be revealed together with Christ at the end of the age. Once broken, now finally made whole. Once shameful and blemished, now spotless and glorious, together with Him. This brokenness each of us hides, layer upon layer, means that there is a healing that He alone brings, washing us over and over and over again with His love. Experiencing and returning His love is the means and the purpose of all things.

You see, all this suffering is only a prelude to glory, but it has already been revealed and opened up to us. God has bared Himself completely in Jesus Christ. He has already made Himself vulnerable, risking it all, and waits to see how we will respond to His overtures of love.

So, looking at this new year I can see the process that He has been working in me. Answering my deepest prayers, He has been slowly stripping away the dirty old rags I have used to cover myself up with, letting Him reveal more and more of my brokenness. I don't think He is by any means done, but I see that healing is coming. And I see that risking everything on love is the only sure gamble a person can make.

Church Exiters Site is Up!

WOW!

Dr. Barb Orlowski has her website up with all the research that she did on people who leave their churches under duress. Many of you took part in her survey.

It is an excellent resource of different books and articles that were published when she compiled her study. It is long but fascinating to browse through. I found some books that I would love to have on my shelf as well as more Internet sites to explore.

Check it out here at Church Exiters Ministering Restoration: Recovering Spiritual Harmony

Same God - New Covenant: Speaking to the Church

This is for all you teachers and preachers out there. Please consider this if you ever speak to a group of 5 or more.

There is a flaw in the thinking of those of us who live in the New Covenant times. (That would be all of you reading this.) The flaw is that we still see God in an Old Covenant relationship with his people – his Church.

In the Old Covenant, (before Jesus came) God related to Israel, for the most part, as a whole – as one nation. They were given the law as a whole, they were told to fast and pray on the same days, they were told to feast and party on the same days and they were all given exactly the same prescription for how they were to conduct themselves. He was the God of Israel. We do see him deal with individual people but even most of the time in dealing with the individual it was for the nation.

Now we spring into the New Covenant times. Jesus comes and starts to deal with people – one on one. How many times in the New Testament do we see him speaking to a single person? He does speak to crowds but sometimes actually makes it confusing for the crowd and then explains it to the smaller groups or individuals. Then he dies and ascends and then we have the Holy Spirit that indwells each individual person.

So now we have the same God as the Old Testament but the playing field is drastically changed. One author likens this to a man who is single, now finding himself married - he is the same man in both instances but now the rules of conduct are vastly changed.

The problem that I see in public speaking, whether it is from a pulpit, a TV screen, a book or a teaching tape is this: The speaker assumes that the message they have to speak is for EVERYONE listening. They view the Church like God treated Israel in the Old Testament.

Here are some of the statements made that I have heard or read recently that show this mindset:
God wants to heal you today. (all of you?)
I relate to my child this way, and you must follow exactly what I do. (but what if they are totally different temperaments?)
God wants you all to be owners of your business instead of working for someone else. (But what if I am not geared to be a business owner – what if I hate to do all the things that that requires – or what if I want to spend time with my family instead?)
If you put out a fleece like Gideon did, you are showing a lack of faith. (Give Gideon a break, he was about to take a very small army against a huge one…wouldn’t you want to make sure you did not mistake what you thought was God for bad pizza the night before? – What about the fact that God understands my level of faith and is not irritated that I ask for confirmation?
You must make a covenant with God over your city. (Really? What if I can barely keep up with my toddlers and new baby right now? Do I have to do that too?)
It is never ok to borrow money. (Never?)
A stay-at-home dad is never right. (and you know this how? What if my family is more important than me working two jobs when my wife can work one and she loves it?)

(Please feel free to add to my list!)


Do you see how the old mindset creeps in? The old mindset says that God intends the same thing for everyone at the same time. How in the world can you stand up in front of 100 people and tell them, in detail, how they are supposed to live, work, treat their children, run their business, or eat? (please don’t misunderstand me – I am not talking of the central truths that say we must show the fruit of the spirit in dealing with people or the central truths of who God is – I’m talking about those who would say that we need to spank a child at every act of willfulness or those who say that you need to only eat the Daniel diet to be truly well or that God ALWAYS does things a certain way)

When you call a fast for your church do you make sure that you address the pregnant moms and the guy going through chemotherapy? When you plan your many meetings do you account for the man who is already working 50 hours a week? And how about the lady in the wheelchair that has had the “God wants to heal you today” spoken over her hundreds of times? Does God want all of us wealthy today? Do each one of us need to step out in radical faith this week? Is everyone called to be at the conference you have planned this week or they will miss God?

Please, I beg of you. When speaking to more people than you can actually know, individually, what is going on in their lives or when speaking to more people in a setting where they cannot ask questions on the spot of how your words impact their lives, please don’t make sweeping proclamations. Please don’t assume that God is saying the same things to all of them at the same time.

He is an individual God. His timing is always right. His words always pierce our heart.

Your words may just be making it much harder for your listeners to live and walk with this amazing, individual God that we have. You may be heaping bundles of bondage on them that they were never meant to carry. Please don’t do this to the people that God has allowed you to speak to.

"The Kingdom of Wordland' by VF @ Clarity Rediscovered

I found this series of posts from a blogger who goes by VF at Clarity Rediscovered. It is an allegory with 5 chapters (short posts) that was both staggering in some of its similarity to our own situation and hauntingly prophetic as to what we see the path our CLB is taking.

This is another one of those, "You mean we are not the only one?" kind of moments.

The Kingdom of Wordland

Chapter One: In the Beginning

Chapter Two: Trouble Brews For the Wordlanders

Chapter Three: The Big Move

Chapter Four: A Mass Exodus

Chapter Five: The Aftermath

A Virtual Soul Spa

On of my greatest delights is to walk into a spa. I've always wanted to open my own and offer a place filled not only with gentle music and soothing scents, but a place that seems to embody the touch of our Master. A place where when you enter your feet are lovingly washed by an attendant before any service is done.

Today I found a "virtual" spa. Mostly, I don't like music on a website because to me it feels intrusive but this music was the kind that makes you breath deep and be still. The words today and the visuals that she places on the site were like a spa for the deepest part of me.

Find a quiet place today, turn on the sound to your computer, take a deep breath and spend a moment at this site today.

A Holy Experience: Joy Thirst

What is Your Favorite Post on Your Own Blog?

Yesterday, I told you what my favorite post (that I had written) was.

I would love to know this: What is your favorite post that you have posted on your blog?

You can include why it is if you want. Be sure to post the link to it.


UPDATES:

Here is Barry's at Honest Faith entitled 'Sacred Places'
Here is Erin's at Decompressing Faith entitled 'An Early Grave, A Better Land'
Mike at Still a Night Own on 'Beating a Dead Cow'
And Heather at A Deconstructed Christian on Things I Learned From Church (That Didn’t Prove True And What I Am Learning Lately)
Katherine Gunn from A Voice in The Desert picks her's entitled 'So...who do you follow?'
Cindy at Run With It posted her favorite. It is entitled, 'another day in paradise.'
Joe from Evangelist Changing chose: 'The Hit'
And Abmo from Windblown Hope chooses his; 'When I Am Weak - Part 3'
John from Cohesive Faith adds his: 'Problems are More Than Skin Deep'

Kingdom of God - Good News to the Poor

“The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has
anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”
Luke 14:18-19


Good verse huh?

Before we left our CLB our leader preached a series of messages on "The Good News to the Poor." It drove my husband nuts because in the prosperity gospel that was being presented, the good news to the poor was that, because of the cross they did not have to be poor any longer. God had come through Jesus so that we no longer needed to be sick or poor. In my husband’s opinion (and now mine) the speaker was totally missing the point and even distorting the true gospel.

I have below a portion of the letter that he (Husband) wrote to our leader. See how it truly displays the heart of God towards us as opposed to the twisted words of the "other" gospel that God wants you rich.


Good news to the poor:

In the context of the day during the life and times of Jesus, if you had wealth, you were viewed of having the favor of God in your life. God was your friend, you were blessed, God was near you and like/approved of you.

If you were poor however, God was not near you, you were not favored of God. He obviously was not pleased with you and, plain, did not like you. You had no hope of God’s favor or His visitation. (In reality, it was a wide pendulum swing to the view of wealth and God’s favor, to the point of error.) The poor walked as second class citizens with the knowledge that God did not favor them, bless them and love them because of them and their sin. The rich were blessed, but they were cursed. There was little hope of anything else.

So here comes Jesus, and he preached “good news” to the poor. As a poor person, you would hear this, and your first reaction was almost disbelief. “You mean that God is coming to visit me?” “God noticed me?” “God is pleased and wants to be with me?” “I too can be favored and blessed by God?”

The answer Jesus brought to the people asking these questions was: “Yes!” The religious leaders would preach “No,” but Jesus was changing it!

To the Pharisees it was the religion and law of the day, but Jesus was preaching a different ‘good news: “God is coming near, the favor of the Lord is near, to you, to all who will believe.”

Just as Jesus healed the lame man whose sins he had forgiven to prove the same, he healed the multitudes to prove the same: God had come near them. “Believe and receive! The Kingdom of God has come, to you!”

It was a paradigm shift to the people of the day who were rejected because they were poor. God would not visit them and they were not blessed. Jesus came to break that theology/practice/understanding of the people. Its not about poverty/money, but God is available to the poor! He likes the poor and wants to dwell with them and be with them. They are being invited to participate in His Kingdom.

So he sent out his boys (disciples) to the villages and towns, the highways and hedges, announcing that the Kingdom of God has come (to them!), ie: good news!

We too can preach the same:
God has come. He has favor for you.
God has come to you. You can come to God. He will dwell with you and you can dwell with him.

This is the Good News to the Poor!!

One For The Leavers - From Abmo

Abmo at Windblown Hope has been blogging one year today. I started to leave him a comment on how instrumental he has been in our lives and it got so long that I decided to post it here. This will give new readers an idea of why he is on my reader list.

Dear Abmo,

On December 12th of last year I left a comment and asked you to TELL ME HOW TO LIVE THIS LIFE!! I was frustrated, running out of hope and didn't know where to turn. I wanted to know what was next. You emailed me back these 7 questions and said the following:

"It is unfortunate that I cannot "show" you how we live or what we do. On the other side it is fortunate that I cannot "show" you. This is a struggle that is meant for you alone. Like Jacob (Gen 32:24) it is a wrestle with God in the dark. BUT I can give you hints in the form of questions that you can mull over in this time...:-)

1)Who is Jesus FOR YOU? What do you know of His character? What did He struggle with? Is He as fickle as us? Does He change? What is His love like? What can you do in order to make Him love you more?

2)If you were the only person on this planet, what would your relationship with Jesus look like? What would you "do" for Him? Could you do anything for Him? What does your relationship with Him look like?

3)Who are you? Have you made peace with yourself? Are you a loved person?.....by Jesus. Are you a liked person?.....by Jesus. What does surrender look like? I like the word "brokenness". Can you tell me why?

4)Time. Is God in a hurry? Is every moment holy? Is there a thing such as a time away from God? Do you have to meet people once a week to develop a special bond with them?

5)What does your everyday life look like? Mundane/ordinary? Is God present in the mundane/ordinariness of your life? He came to set the captives free. Free from what?

6)What is the church? (What you know of church has to die completely).

7)Our struggle is usually between right and wrong. Is there a third option?

A lot of questions. Some answers take a long time to be born. When it is time. Give yourself time. I will be praying for the scary part.

As I look over these questions today, I realize that only through the Father addressing each of these questions in His own time allows me to be who and where I am today. Thank you for not giving my husband and me a plan to follow or even your journey to emulate. Instead you gave the most important questions I have had posed to me - ever - in my life. They were the questions that seemed to be on the heart of the Father to answer in our lives. They were insightful and prophetic. I kept the email and check back to it almost monthly to see what Father has been teaching me about them.

I am grateful to have been able to read along on the window that you (and your wife) have provided. I have benefited so much from your encouragement. I remain grateful.

Barb

The God's Honest Truth - Book Review

As I have said before in the past few posts, I have been reading Darin Hufford's book The God's Honest Truth.

Initially I was a bit put off by just the title. I have heard those words so many times from preachers who would say, "OK, here's the God's honest truth about....." and for almost all of those times we did not hear truth about God but only a spin on what the preacher wanted to get across on his own agenda.

But in reading and pondering this book, I can honestly say that I don't think there has been a book that I have read that contained as much of truth about God as this one. In so many ways it gave me a new lens in which to clearly focus on the character and love of Father. And I as I said in my last post, I am truly being changed.

Darin goes through the passage of 1 Corinthians 13 on love and expounds on each of the attributes of love. Now, I thought I knew about all there was to know about patience or kindness or envy, but I was sorely wrong. The reason I was wrong is because I took what I knew about my own patience, kindness and such and applied it to God. For instance, I am sometimes patient but only because I make myself be patient when I really want to be angry. But God is not like me. He is patient because He is Love and love understands and is not angry. Love has already died to Himself, therefore He does not have to try to be patient, He just is. This makes a HUGE difference in how I see how God views me. All of the other concepts were just as eye opening and earth shattering in how I previously viewed God in a warped and twisted way.

Here is a brief overview of the points that he covers in each chapter of his book. I hope it spurs you into reading it. Let me know what you think.

From page 347-348 (indentions are mine)

God is patient because He understands everything in your heart. He knows why you do what you do and He is never surprised or taken off guard.

God is kind and He desires to touch you in your heart. The heart is always His aim and He never misses.

God does not envy. He never desires to take for Himself what others have but He longs to give away all that He has and He is never tempted to take things back because He didn't get the attention.

God does not boast or brag about the highest truth about Him, but He willingly lowers Himself beneath you in order to lift you up.

God is not proud of the opinion that He doesn't need anyone. He desires relationship with you and He continuously makes Himself vulnerable for the purpose of making that possible.

God is not rude. He never leaves things unfinished or unspoken. He does not give the silent treatment or play hide and seek, but He makes everything about Himself known and keeps nothing hidden.

God is not self seeking. He is gratified and fulfilled when you are glorified. His eyes are always seeking the best for you and He is never worried about what He gets in return.

God is not easily angered or provoked to any mood other than love. He is not high maintenance and He never wants you to walk in fear of offending or hurting Him.

God keeps no record of wrongs because He refuses to call you by the name of your past. He doesn't hold things over you or against you. He continuously and eternally wipes your record clean so that He can clearly focus on your heart.

God does not delight in evil and He is not tempted by luring lies and fantasies. He does not desire romance because His heart desires the real you. He cannot be enticed with ideas that would benefit His kingdom at the expense of you.

God rejoices in the truth about you because it is so wonderful and meaningful to Him.

God always protects you from caving in in the midst of unbearable pressure and anguish. He provides a strength that holds you up through the storms of life and carries you to your very purpose, which is to be His child.

God always trusts you with His Heart doors open to you at all times; no exceptions.

God always hopes in you because he knows that He knows the end of your story.

God always perseveres and proves Himself to be what He claims to be. He stands through the storm and walks through the fire only to demonstrate the authenticity of His love for you.

God never fails, because he is driven by His very essence; Love. It is the part of Him that sees everything inside of you and knows every inner emotion, thought and feeling. His love for you soaks through every outward thing that stands in its way and saturates your spirit, soul and body forever.

Home Run at Windblown Hope

I really don't have much to say right now.

I am immersed in some of Darin Hufford's blogs, podcasts and am reading his book, God's Honest Truth. Lots and lots to think about. Talk about Amazing Grace.... Have any of you read his stuff? What do you think? Is God really that good?

But in blogland please go and read this by Abmo at Windblown hope: God's Judgement. He bats one out of the park with this one.

(This metaphor out to those who watched the home run thingy on TV last night....I did...thanks to Husband.) ( I hope the guy who hit so many home runs (Josh Hamilton) and then lost the competition is not wondering why God did not let him win it.)

The Scattering....Prophetic Voices?

I was listening to the God Journey Podcast this week. If you haven’t started listening to this – please do. Husband and I carve out 45 min a week to do this together. It is fun and also challenges us with almost each podcast. It is part of the Dying of the Cloth With Grace that I wrote about the other day. If you are new to the whole thing, start with the last 3. They are great.

Anyway, Wayne and Brad were talking about how people are doing outside the box of the institutional church. A commenter was saying that he felt that Wayne and Brad were not encouraging people enough to get into a “group” for regular fellowship and worship and teaching.

At this point, I do believe that Wayne almost began to speak prophetically. I bet he would not think that was what he was doing but it sure resonated in me that way. I transcribed the following from the last few minutes of the podcast “Enjoying Real Relationship”:

“In reading through the minor prophets, how often God says I’m going to scatter my people, scatter my people, scatter my people. Then there are other passages that say, ‘Then I will gather them together again.’ And I honestly, and this is the closest I get at times to feeling like I get a heartbeat from God’s voice in things like this, I do feel like God is scattering his people away from their false gods of religious institutions that we served more than Him. (The places) where we got false notions of who God is. That God is scattering his people so that they will find Him again. And then I believe God is going to re-gather these people. But He is going to gather them in a way that is more healthy and whole. (He then talks about all the lumber people are carrying around to build a newer and better sheep pens) He goes on to say, “You watch over the next 5 years the way God will begin to connect brothers…there are going to be ways that God just knits people together as relationships bear fruit.

This gave me a lot of hope. It makes sense to what I am seeing. It makes sense of all the great people that either had to leave or got thrown out of their “pen.” In a huge sweep of history there have been many times that people of God have been scattered. Maybe that is why we feel a bit scattered and disconnected. Maybe they felt like we do. Maybe it really is a part of what Father wants to be doing right now.

Another reader of Wayne's blog said this about the church - again I believe a prophetic voice:

It is clear that God is shaking up organisational church all over the place. When praying the other morning he gave me a picture for the church I left (since then many others are exiting as well) but which I think is applicable worldwide. He showed me a glass beaker punched all over with holes and water was pouring out of the holes. But what was so amazing was that as the water landed on the table it did not remain in little droplets separately but it made a pool which was held together by the surface tension. If more water came near it and joined it then it became one with the first lot of water so you could not tell which was which. God is far more interested in the contents than the container and those contents do not need a structure to keep them together.

Could we be participating in the next big “Move of God?” We could be…. but sorry….. those words still creep me out.

Free Falling In Life

Tracy at The Best Parts has a series on my favorite book (at the moment) Families Where Grace is in Place, by Jeff VanVonderen. Please go over and read the past few posts and then buy the book. It has been a paradigm shift for me as I re-evaluate my past parenting and marriage and what I want to become in the future.

One part of his book that still has me thinking is the whole idea of what and who we are on the inside and what and who we pack onto the outer core of ourselves that people see.

He addresses it like this (my paraphrase). You have two children. Both children do not really yet know that they are loved by Father (God). Both children are empty on the inside and long to be validated. They both long for belonging. They are both lost. But one child packs on “good behavior.” They get good grades, go to church, are the leader in their youth group, don’t smoke or drink, wear dress up clothes without screaming, and would never think of marriage outside another church kid. The other child packs on “bad behaviors.” They dress Goth, listen to the wrong kinds of music, hang out with “undesirables,” won’t play by any of your rules, bad grades and all the rest.

VanVonderen asks us, which child needs loved, needs God and needs to shed all the outer lining of their lives and become real to know Father in his Love and Grace? Both children are headed toward the same place of emptiness. One just looks better getting there. We are so much more at ease with the first child than we are with the second. (I realize that some of this is because the child with good behavior will not have to face the same consequences as the child with bad behavior.) But the point is – both children are empty inside and need love and need to know that Father loves them. Only then will the outer shell truly reflect who and what they are and healing will be able to happen.

I understand this. I even like this. But I hate living with this. Here’s how:

I feel like I have no measuring stick. No way to determine if my kids are doing well or not. No way to know how to accurately judge anyone else let alone know how to even judge my own heart. It is a free falling feeling with no base or ground. Only God really knows their heart or mine. I, on the other hand, have only the exterior to figure out how someone is doing and now I can’t use that measurement in the way I've been accustomed.

I can’t describe to you the sheer, unnerving frustration of not having any way to measure myself or others (Note: not that I'm saying it ever really worked). In my kids’ lives, if they were doing well – we basically left them alone and felt good about them and ourselves (but sometimes only to find out that they really weren’t doing well at all inside – where it counted). The child with bad behavior got the attention but only to attempt to get them to exchange bad behavior for good behavior. We knew only God could change their hearts but it did not make us stop trying to pack good behavior onto their outer self. I was still sure that right choices would produce a right heart. “Do right, Feel right,” was my motto.

But now that all “rules” are falling off - now that I am exploring walking with Grace, I find it unnerving to lack of a set of parameters to assure myself that all is well. How do I evaluate my own heart today? Am I OK? Should I be doing something more? Less? Am I learning to trust Him today? Should I pray for this or that? And how about my kids? How do I help them “walk with God?” For instance, how do I decide if a man is right for their lives? A year ago this man had a very, very narrow door to fit through to be deemed appropriate for my daughters. Now, what do I judge it by?

Being a Pharisee was so much easier. Now don’t start yelling…I know it wasn’t really but it did give a false sense of security that I found attractive and addicting. A false sense of security that I wrapped around myself with a sigh of relief. The law made me feel more secure. I knew what I had to do, I knew what others needed to do and I knew how to determine if we were winning or loosing.

Now that the false security blanket of Law and Rules is gone – it feels so…..out there. I’m free falling and I don’t have a clue. I hope the “Whoever” that packed my parachute was trustworthy and being particularly careful. He promised He would be. If not, there is going to be a terrible mess.

Picture from here. I loved that there was a community falling together. I think ultimately that is what everyone has been talking about the past few days.

Community

I think this quote by Bonhoffer posted by a friend the other day sums up what I have thought about this week.

“ The person who loves their dream of community will destroy community, but the person who loves those around them will create community."


Dietrich Bonhoeffer