As I read the blogs of others and I look back at the leaving of my old church, one subject seems to come up again and again. How is the forgiveness thing going? Have you been able to forgive yet? When you see the people that are shunning you or have spoken badly about you, is there still something there. Do you still want them exposed? Do you want them to pay for their sins?
I know many of us know that we should be “over it” by now. Many of us purpose in our hearts to try to forgive. Many of us have just decided that we will “put on” forgiveness. When we meet up with the offenders we will just treat them as if it is forgiven but deep in our hearts we know we are failing miserably at the whole forgiveness thing.
Well, I’m in the same boat as you. I had just decided that I would treat them as they had not hurt me. I would be kind….nice even. But forgiveness from the heart…..couldn’t do that.
That is until I started re-adjusting how I saw our Father. See, my view of Him was that He was just like me. I was taught, and had taught, that he forgave me of my sins. But somehow that had morphed into the fact that essentially He had just decided to treat me in a way that did not reflect how my sins (I) deserved to be treated. Somehow he still hung onto my sins and yet treated me with grace and mercy.
When reading the God’s Honest Truth, by Darrin Hufford these past few weeks I have a whole new picture of my sins and what Jesus did. He did not just forgive me of my offences. He BECAME my sin. He took it all on himself and then paid the price for it. It was no longer my sin but His. It is gone. Paid for. Obliterated.
And it was odd. I did not set out to be more forgiving as I read this book but the more and more I see of God’s true character and gaze on what is really his face and not just an extension of myself, something radical is happening within me. I am being changed.
I am being changed. I actually cringe at typing that sentence because I have been changed before only to fall back into my own ways. It usually never stays. It never lasts. But this time it is different. I am not trying to change. I am not trying to be more forgiving. I just see it popping out of me and it is strange to me to even see it. It is like, “Whoa,……where did that come from!”
I am convinced today that the more in focus we see our wonderful Father….the more we see Him without the lens of ourselves making the picture fuzzy…. the more we will become like Him.
Being conformed to His image is only as good as the image we have of Him. It has nothing to do with the “shoulds” of life and everything to do with just knowing Him and having a clear picture of Him.